A Heavy Load
by HaloFin17
Summary: A sequel and counterpart to Remember. Equally angsty, but this time from Kurt's POV. Enjoy, and please feel free to review!
1. Chapter 1

**Summary:** A sequel and counterpart to "Remember." Equally angsty, but this time it's Kurt's POV. Enjoy, and please feel free to review!

**Disclaimer: **Nope, I still don't own Kurt, or Markie, or Vert, or any of those other awesome guys. Unfortunately.

**Author's Note: **Many thanks to KY for this idea! It had been kinda in the back of my mind after writing "Remember," but it took a little encouragement from her to get me going. This is obviously similar to "Remember," but from Kurt's POV instead of Markie's. I also added a second chap to both fics. They're songs I've always liked and thought were appropriate for the two characters. I've never worked songs into my stories before, but if you like that kind of thing, I hope you can likewise see where I'm coming from in choosing those particular songs. Enjoy!

**A Heavy Load**

"_If I'd told all I knew, it might've kept Markie out of prison, but it could've ruined me. So I didn't say anything…"_

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Guilt is a heavy load to bear. If you had but said something then, would everything be different now? You got him involved. Why didn't you say something? Why didn't you help him? Later, he had crashed, and still you did not help him. You left him there, left him to a fate worse than death. Why didn't you go back? Why didn't you just say something, so very long before? Oh, what sleepless nights might have been saved…

Anger is a heavy load to bear. You tried to tell him, but your warnings went unheeded. You watched as he was careless with his future and blamed you for his fate. How your rage had been awoken then! But he never stopped blaming you. From that point on, every bad thing was your fault alone, and you could not make amends. So you let your anger simmer, while he let his rage consume him like a flood. Why didn't you swallow your selfish pride? Oh, what spiteful cries might have been changed…

Loneliness is a heavy load to bear. Despite even your anger, you missed him. He's your brother. He'd always been there, even when you didn't want him to be. Then suddenly, he was gone, absent from your life. And now, if you fail, he will be gone forever. Why didn't you tell him how you felt while still you had the chance? Oh, what aching hearts might have been soothed…

Pain is a heavy load to bear. Pain of betrayal, pain of loss. Why do pains of the heart hurt so much more? Even when he hit you, it was your heart that bruised and swelled, your heart that never fully healed. You aren't sure it ever will. But man's time on earth is short, often far shorter than expected. Why didn't you share your pain with him before it was too late? Oh, what countless hurts might have been eased…

Sorrow is a heavy load to bear. You mourn for the things that never were, the things that might have been, and the things that nevermore shall be. Your grief oppresses you, overshadows you, even in your brightest moments. There are some memories that cannot be erased, some wrongs that can never be made right. Why didn't you work to set things right, before they got so out of hand? Oh, what bitter tears might have been spared…

Worry is a heavy load to bear. You fear for him, more than he'll ever know. Your mind is bombarded with images of him in pain – alone and afraid. You would do anything to protect him, but you fear you'll be too late. Why didn't you just go back for him when he had crashed? Oh, what chilling fears might have been stilled…

Love is a heavy load to bear. Regardless of all else, you love him. He's your brother. You've always loved him. _That_ has never changed, and never will. _That_ is constant. You loved him just as much then, when things went so horribly wrong, as you do now. Why didn't you simply show it then, as you are striving to right now? Oh, what joyful times might have been shared…

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But it is too late now. Now, you have arrived, and you know that he is here. Somewhere. You cautiously step forward and call his name, your voice hushed yet urgent. But there is no reply. You proceed further into the great room, further toward the spire of eerie green light that casts an unearthly glow and many jagged shadows around you.

Suddenly, the floor in front of you gives way, and you can barely stop yourself from falling over the edge. A platform is rising up from below, and your heart pounds. You already know what it is, what it must be – a victory trophy of you enemies, now left behind to taunt you. The very thing you have come for.

You brace yourself for the worst, but nothing could truly have prepared you for the horror of this sight. Your brother hangs there, helpless, his limbs slack in the restraints that both support and hurt him. Even in unconsciousness, his expression is one of pain. As is your own.

His frame diminished from abuse, he is but a shell of when you saw him last. His face is pale, shadowed by dark bruises, and you cannot bear to think of what the rest of his weakened body must look like. While you know there may yet be time to save him, you are too late to protect him. Far too late.

But the worst is yet to be seen, and when your eyes rest on it at last, you feel your stomach twist, disgusted, in response. His left arm is gone, amputated, and has been replaced with cold, black metal – a sick yet powerful imitation of the severed human limb. You are too late.

Your shoulders slump, defeated, as you bow your head in quiet shame. Still rooted where you stand, you whisper that you're sorry. An artificial arm twitches ever so slightly in response, but your downcast eyes will never see it. You are too late.

Guilt is indeed a heavy load to bear…


	2. A Fitting Song

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A Fitting Song

"Come Back Down" by Lifehouse

Staring right back in your face,

A memory can't be erased,

I know because I've tried.

Start to feel the emptiness,

And everything I'm gonna miss,

I know that I can't hide.

All this time is passing by,

I think it's time to just move on…

When you come back down,

If you land on you're feet,

I hope you find a way to make it back to me.

When you come around,

I'll be there for you,

Don't have to be alone with what you're going through.

Stop to breathe and fake a smile,

It's all the same after a while,

I know that you are tired.

Carrying the ones you lost,

A picture framed with all the thoughts,

You know you hold inside.

I hope that you can find your way back to the place where you belong…

When you come back down,

If you land on you're feet,

I hope you find a way to make it back to me.

When you come around,

I'll be there for you,

Don't have to be alone with what you're going through.

You're coming back down,

You said you feel lost, can I help you find it?

When you come around,

From time to time we all are blinded.

You're coming around,

You don't have to tell me what you're feeling.

I know what you're going through,

I won't be the one who lets go of you.

I think it's time to just move on…

When you come back down,

If you land on you're feet,

I hope you find a way to make it back to me.

When you come around,

I'll be there for you,

Don't have to be alone with what you're going through.


End file.
